WHO are YOU?

Doris looked from Rick to Dick and back again. "Hey, there's two of 'em," she said, squinting her eyes and wrinkling her forehead. "That's what we were gonna tell ya but haven't had a chance," piped up Kim, "Jonas told us that Dick had been locked up and we thought he was impersonating Rick and figured he was up to no good so that's why we captured him!" From the floor came an out of breath, "Rick. I am Rick." "No he's not," said the Rick at the door, "I am Rick. That's Dick and I have been chasing him all over the place trying to catch him!" The girls looked at the men. Then they looked at each other and then at the men again. "Well," Shauna said, "I can only think of one thing to do." "Me, too," said Judy, 'GET HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" And with that the girls pounced on the one at the door and before you could say Whistlestop Jiggle Pig, they had him hogtied and sitting back against the kitchen wall facing the Rick/Dick on the floor. "Now what?" asked Patsy, "We can't keep them here." "You betcha can't," said the first to be tied up man, "I'll press charges for kidnapping right after I press charges for assault." "Yeah, yeah, yeah," sneered Doris, "We're shakin' in our boots." "Well, I think somebody should go get Jonas. He should be able to tell these boys apart," said Patsy, " And the rest should stay here to watch these two." Judy leapt up and grabbed her keys, "I'LL GO," she said quickly, "But somebody better come with me." "Wait," said Kim, " how about Patsy and Shauna go while you and I and Doris stay here. I can think of a couple questions we might be able to ask that only Ranger Rick would have the answer." "You're right, " agreed Judy as she tossed her keys to Patsy, "Hurry up you two and we'll hold the fort here. If you'll watch these boogers Doris, Kim and I will compare notes outside and be right back with a few questions." "I'll watch 'em all right! I hope one of em moves cause I've gotta new choke hold I've been wanting to practice," followed by laughter. Patsy and Shauna had made it to the truck but were just sitting in it. "What's wrong?" hollered Kim. "Don't know," came the response, "It won't start!!" "Did you turn the key?" "YES," said Patsy, " We did turn the key. Duh." Kim and Judy headed out to the truck to see what they could figure out. Meanwhile, Doris came to the door and said, "What are you guys doing?" Kim explained that the truck wouldn't start so Doris said, "don;t mess with it now, just take mine." The girls decided that was a good idea so Doris' keys were passed on to Patsy. Shauna and Patsy got up in Doris' truck, put their seatbelts on and sat there. Doris' truck wouldn't start either. With a grim look, Shuana got out of the truck and marched towards the cabin. "Where ya goin'?" asked Kim. "To have a little chat with the boys inside. Doris, you come with. I might need your help." Judy was messing around the back of her truck and as the others turned to look they saw her pulling a minibike out of the bed. "What are YOU doing?" came from Kim. "Going for help," said Judy. Wanna go along?" "Sure," answered Kim. Judy fired it up. Kim climbed on the back and off they went. Patsy watched them drive off with her head tilted and a puzzled look in her eye then turned to watch Shauna and Doris going thru the cabin door. "Shoulda had them bring a six pack back, " she said to herself, "We could use it." Then she headed for the cabin to see what was happening in there. SHe was sure of one thing. It would be entertaining.

The girls were extremely antsy waiting for 6:00 to come around. They piddled around with the jigsaw puzzle, absentmindedly picking up and trying various shapes in the partially finished corners of the polar bears in the snow scene. Was Doris coming back? they each wondered. As Shauna glanced at her watch for the 300th time, they all happily gazed toward the door when they heard feet plodding on the wooden porch. Patsy rose from the chair to open the door for Doris. She was laughing as she swung open the door and shouted "It's about time you showed up! Where have you been?" Boy was she surprised! It wasn't Doris. It was none other than Ranger Dick! "Well Ranger Rick!"Judy greeted, "we are so, uh, glad you came back!" she added as she grabbed Shauna's arm for support. "Uh, yeah, you still owe me the rest of a game of monopoly" Patsy quickly said. She acted eager to see Rick/Dick but inside her legs were jello. Kim cowered in the corner of the couch and tried to slip off to the linai but Shauna reached for her and while her teeth were clenched she managed a fake smile and said "Kim! Ranger Di- I mean, Rick is here to play more games. I think you should FIRST show him the little leak under the kitchen sink!" "Oh, no, JUDY is the one that discovered it I think SHE can show him!" Patsy started snickering at that suggestion. Dick said " I don't have any tools on me and that's maintenence's responsibility anyway." "You've helped us before" piped up Kim, just now catching on to what Shauna was plotting. Judy started to get brave too, "I've got tools in my bag that I'll let you borrow. You crawl down under there and I'll get your supplies!" She was excited now. She had confidence in whatever plan Shauna had in mind. Patsy and Shauna moved the kitchen table so Ranger D had room to scoot under the sink. The girls were all in the kitchen area now watching Dick crawl on his hands and knees. When he was in as far as he could go Patsy yelled "NOW!!" and all there was, was a flurry of hands and feet and pots and pans rattling and Dick yelling "stop, stop, no, no!!" They almost had him pummeled to tears when they heard someone yell above all the commotion; "What are you guys doing!?! You need help? HERE! I've got a lead rope in my pocket!!!" It was Doris! She'd come at a perfect time. The girls had him in a headlock, an armlock and an anklelock. It was definitely due to strength in numbers. Doris ran over and gave the final blow to Dicks ego by wrestling his arms behind his back and proceeded to hog tie his arms to his legs and when he was incapacitated completely they all released their grips from his shirt, pants and hair and gave collected breaths. Shauna's shirt was torn, Patsy's hair was as if she'd been in a wind tunnel, Kim had lost a shoe and an earring and Judy's glasses were a bit crooked but her water wings came through just fine. "Water wings!!!" Shauna laughed. "When did you put those on?!" "When I went to get my tools I figured I'd better put them on for safety's sake. You never know, Dick could have thrown us all in the lake, never to be seen again. " They all just stared at her for a few seconds then Patsy broke the silence with, "Hey, are we all just gonna lay here on the floor with Dick or are we gonna call Ranger Rick and tell him we caught his evil twin?"
They all got up and brushed themselves off while Doris double checked her square knots. She smacked Dick in the face and chuckled just for fun. "Hey! Why did I tie up Ranger Rick and why did I just enjoy smacking him?" she finally wondered. "And why did you say we'll call Ranger Rick when he's right here? And who's this Dick you keep talking about?" "We'll explain it all while we wait for the REAL Rick to get here." Kim assured her. "Yeah, then I still wanna go ask Jonas some more questions. I think he knows even more about this than Rick does." surmised Judy. "Jinkies Daphne, we'll get right on it!" Laughed Shauna. Just then they heard Rick stomping on the porch. He didn't look happy..........at all..........................

The plan

Yes I too thought this was the evil twin Dick but we gotta play it cool said Shauna. We all watch alot of mystery shows what would they do in those? Lets see , first they would not let the suspect know they knew he was not who he was pretending to be said Kim. Exactly! said Shauna, Lets go back in there and act like nothing is wrong and... What if her tries to kill us said Kim? Well he's not gonna do that if he doesn't suspect we know. Lets get back out there and we need to really pay close attention and see if there are differences between he and Rick that we will be able to tell the difference. Good idea said Kim and we need to at least let Judy know so she can watch too lets go! Wait we need the game said Shauna. What game? replied Kim Ohhh the game got it!

Kim and Shauna returned with monopoly hoping it would be a game long enough to allow them to really study Dick. As they were playing along all the girls were making mental notes of Dick, the little freckle on his left ear, how his right sideburn was longer than his left, that he snorted when he laughed, that his eyes were actually hazel and not green like his brothers, and how he LOVED oatmeal raisin cookies etc... Patsy was concentrating on the game and rolling in the dough and properties not realizing she and Dick were really the only ones playing the others were going through she motions. She even jumped up on the table and did a little happy dance when she got park place to add with her boardwalk! Finally Dick got a call on his walkie talkie from the ranger station it appeared some boy scouts may have let a campfire get out of control and he needed to go check it out or at least that is what he told the girls. Once the voice came across the radio he took the call outside so as to not tip off the girls in case his brother the real ranger answered. Relieved to be able to leave before totally getting taken to the cleaners by Patsy he tried to act disappointed and made his apologies and promised to return another time to finish the game and left. When he left everyone started talking at once about what they noticed and Patsy whistled and said WAIT A MINUTE! What the heck are you all talking about?? Oh that's right she doesn't know said Judy who explained the whole mess. OHHHHHHH why didn't you tell me said Patsy??????? We couldn't tell you with out alerting him said Kim. So now what do we do asked Patsy. What can we do? We really have no proof of anything said Judy. Well I think we need to do some investigating on our own said Shauna. First lets take this glass he used to drink his milk after washing down the dozen or so cookies he ate and put it in a bag we might need it later for dna or prints. Dang! you do watch alot of crime dramas don't you said Kim. Yep too many probably laughed Shauna. We need to talk to Jonas at the store, see what else we can find out about Dick like why he was in trouble with the law and maybe some other quirks of his that might help us realize from a distance who is who said Judy. Is Doris coming back from the race asked Patsy? Maybe we shouldn't leave the cabin if Doris is coming back it might be dangerous for her to be here by herself she added. Not sure if she is she will be back by 6 said Kim. Ok we can wait that long said Shauna. In the mean time the girls were talking about what questions they could aske Jonas with out making him suspicious. It seemed to the girls it was best if no one else knew what they suspsected at this time. Wonder WHY he is doing this said Shauna? Is he harmful or harmless added Patsy? Well it seems to me any one portraying some one else to gain the trust of others is not harmless said Judy. Lets make a list of all the things we each noticed about him so we can all remember a few of them in case we encounter him again suggested Judy, and a list of questions for Jonas too added Kim. Good idea if we each take a question maybe he won't be suspicious. My first question is why was he in prison said Shauna but how do you ask that with out sending up a red flag?

Game time

Patsy and Shauna were having a dandy conversation with Ranger Rick. Gee, he was much more "charming and suave" outside of the strict confines of his ranger uniform. If they didn't know better, they'd swear he was flirting! Judy and Kim watched every move he made and were getting ever more nervous. Shauna invited him to sit a spell and have a cookie and a glass of milk. Patsy continued with more tales of our incredible (however odd it may be) week-end so far. She laughed until she had tears while retelling the Judy/bear/coon story even though she hadn't yet arrived at the campsite. "What I would have given to be here then! Judy with her long johns around her ankles running from a bear!!!!" "Believe me"added Shauna, "I WAS here and it definely WAS funny!! All her antics make it ALMOST worth what we've been through!" Shauna and Patsy were reveling in all the details when Shauna happened to notice.."Hey! What's with you two? You're being awfully quiet and THAT never happens." "Oh, nothing, just taking it all in." Judy covered well and Kim gave her an approving nod. They had to let the girls know what was up though. Kim interrupted, "let's all play a game! Patsy, could you come help me get it out of the bedroom?" "What do you need me for?" Pats asked "I think you can handle it!" Kim glanced nervously at Judy. Judy saved the moment by adding "Shauna will help you. Go ahead Shauna!" Shauna dutifully followed Kim to the bedroom, "What are we playing?" "SHHHHH!!" whispered Kim, "That's not Rick!!" "We don't have a game called that do we?" questioned Shauna. "No! No! In there!! That's not Ranger Rick! That's his evil twin! We have to do something!! Quick!! You're the brave one, what do we do??"

Someones at the door

"Hi young lady! I forgot your milk!" It was old Jonas from the store. "I knew you were out and would probably need it for breakfast. I remembered as soon as I got back to the store. You don't owe me a penny. It's on the house!" Jonas didn't give the girls a chance to say a word. He just continued smiling as he turned and hopped back in his golf cart. "Well, see! I knew he was a nice old man all along!" stated Kim. "Nice? You thought he was going to have us for supper and we were the main course!!" Judy reminded. "He probably put poison in the milk" Shauna teased. "Here Patsy, take a swig and find out!" Patsy & Shauna laughed at the idea. "I'm not drinkin' it now!" said Kim in a worried tone. "Oh, it's fine!" assured Patsy, "The seal is still on it and everything." "Nope, I read where they can inject stuff in sealed containers and no one can even tell." Kim was convinced of that. Just then the girls heard another knock at the door. Judy grabbed her bag (just in case) and peeked through the kitchen window. "Oh good, it's Ranger Rick!" she happily announced. "He must have heard my horn!" "I'm glad SOMEONE can hear" added Kim, "I'm deaf now because of the little horn episode." Judy waved her off and greeted Ranger Rick. "Boy are we ever glad to see you!" "Hey Ranger Rick! We've never seen you without your uniform on. Do you have a hot date?" Patsy asked in an ornery manner. "You look different without your ranger hat and khakis" Shauna chimed. "We're glad to see you all the same. Some more weird things have been happening. At least in our imaginations. "
While Shauna and Patsy carried on a nice conversation, Judy pulled Kim aside. "Something's not right here." "What do you mean?" "Ranger Rick has a small scar on his chin. Where did it go?" Kim tried to glance his way to look for herself, then she sniffed and gasped,"Oh no, I smell old spice again!"

One Mystery Down

"OK, let's just calm down and think about this," said Shauna, ever the voice of reason. Patsy agreed, "First off, how do you know that was the same coon as the one Kim ran over?" "Oh," said Kim, "That's easy. Did you see how his mask shaded out to almost grey on one side and he had a tan tip on his tail? I noticed it when we were looking at him after I had hit him. He musta just been knocked out and after we drove away he came to and followed the trail to this cabin. He really likes yogos, apparently!!" "But what about the shower gel?" asked Judy, "Where did it come from?" Patsy had taken the tube from Judy and was looking at it intently. Without a word, she turned and carried the tube into the cabin. The others followed. Patsy went to the shower and pulled back the curtain, then busted out in laughter!!!!!!!!!!!!!. "WHAT?? What's so funny?" asked Kim. "Patsy could just point at the tube and then at herself. Shauna went to the kitchen and returned with a glass of water which she handed to Patsy, with orders to, "Drink." Patsy took a slug of the water, looked at the tube again and almost blew the water out her nose. Finally, she calmed down enough to say, "THIS is mine!!!! I must have picked up Rick's gel by mistake when I was packing my stuff for the trip up here." "Well, now's a fine time to tell us, " said Kim. "We have been smelling Old Spice ever since you got here and have been scared to death that it was Ranger Rick's criminal twin!!!" Shauna spoke up, "I am just glad we solved that mystery! I was beginning to wonder myself. But I'll bet Dick is locked up somewhere if he is as bad as Jonas said. Those kind don't spend much time on the outside." Just then there was a tap at the door. Judy went to answer it, figuring it was Ranger Rick coming in response to the air horn blast. Boy, was she surprised when she opened the door.............

Behind the Cabin Door

All talking at once, each insisting it wasn't SHE who left the door unlocked, the group moved towards the cabin. Patsy spoke up, "Well, as much activity as there has been at this cabin I can't imagine anyone hiding in there, can you?" "You're right," agreed Shauna, "But what did that old fart say about Ranger Rick having a twin brother?" "I heard that. He said there was a twin whose name was Dick and he had been in trouble with the law," said Kim, "I wonder what he did." "Do you suppose there is anything connected to him and the Old Spice we keep smelling? " Judy asked anxiously. "And I can't believe I left my bag, with EVERYTHING, inside that cabin when it wasn't locked!!" "You'd think," piped up Kim, "That if some crook was in our cabin the first thing he woulda done was to have searched through Judy's bag looking for money, but she paid for the groceries. Was that all the money you had Judy?" she continued turning to look at Judy, who was busy digging through her bag of priceless items. "Nope," answered Judy, "Looks like it's all here." "How would you even KNOW if somebody took anything out of that quagmire?" asked Shauna. "What do you mean?" responded Judy, "I KNOW EVERYTHING that is in this bag and usually where it is, too! Speaking of.... I am missing my safety mirror and my last bag of Yogos!!!" Just then the girls heard scuffling sounds coming from behind the cabin door!! "Quick," whispered Patsy, "I'll open the door while you get ready to use your club on whoever comes out, Shauna!!" They moved into position. Judy and Kim took up positions just off the edge of the porch, you know, to catch them if they got away from Pats and Shauna. (wink wink) Patsy reached forward carefully and just touched the handle when the door busted open and crashed into Patsy which caused her to step backwards into Shauna who dropped her club. Chaos ensued. Kim and Judy raced each other to the pickup truck, where of course, the doors were locked. Both were digging frantically through Judy's bag looking for Kim's keys. Judy came up with the air horn which she blasted in Kim's ear. "Geezaloo," exclaimed Kim, grabbing her ear, "You wanna be careful with that thing? You're gonna deafen me!" "I'm sorry. I'm sorry," said Judy, "I just wasn't thinking!! I thought maybe Ranger Rick would still be in the area and if he heard the horn he would come back here to help us." Meanwhile, on the porch, Shauna and Patsy had managed to regain their footing but both were almost in tears with hysterical laughter. "What's so funny?" asked Kim still rubbing her ear. All the two girls could do was point. Judy and Kim followed the poiting fingers to see the raccoon from the previous night shuffling down the trail, a bag of yogos in his mouth. "He must like Yogos as much as you, huh Judy?" asked Shauna. Judy was off and running, "Come back here you silly racoon!! Those are MINE!!" The coon dropped something and put it in high gear. "Hey! What did he drop?" yelled Kim. "It looks like a tube of shower gel," responded Judy, "It IS shower gel. You aren't gonna believe this. It's OLD SPICE shower gel!!!! And he brought it out of OUR CABIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Groceries

As the girls stood in the woods so that the old man from the general store did not see them, they started to lay out a plan of attack. Judy and Kim took charge, they decided that since Shauna had a club/walking stick, she should go first, Patsy second, size mattered more than brains and Judy and Kim would bring up the rear.
So as the girls left their hiding place in the woods and stepped out in the clearing, they heard someone say, "Hey girls what are you up to?", all four simultaneously turned around and at the same time Patsy yelled out in pain, because as Shauna was turning she swung her club/walking stick, and struck Patsy on the arm, leaving it red and with a large welt on it. There stood Ranger Rick, arms crossed and tapping his foot in the dirt.
After seeing who it was and relieved at the same time, Kim and Judy started telling him every thing that has happen to them since they arrived. Everything from the canoe outing, the bear, the raccoon that Judy thought was a bear, the accident of running over the raccoon, the disappearing Cheerios, the smell of Old Spice in the cabin and the old man at the general store that also smelled like Old Spice. As soon as they finished telling Ranger Rick the whole story, Ranger Rick, raises a waving hand and yells out, "Good morning Jonas."
Once again the girls turn in the direction of the cabin, this time Patsy ducking the swing of the club/walking stick, that Shauna had in her possession and laughing because she missed her. Right in front of them stood the old man from the general store. He said good morning to Ranger Rick and asked us if they had a good hike back to the cabin.
The old man from the general store said he arrived before we returned, he checked the door to see if it was unlocked, which it was, and preceded to unload the groceries from the golf cart into the cabin. At which then the old man from the general store turned to Judy and said, "That will be $31.65, for the groceries."
Judy ran into the cabin got her bag and came out with $32.00 and told the old man from the general store to keep the change. Wow what a big tipper.
So everyone stood outside the cabin for a little bit longer and finally Ranger Rick said he had to get back to work. After he left Kim and Judy mentioned to the old man from the general store that Ranger Rick was a nice guy and they felt very safe knowing he was around.
The old man from the general store replied as he was getting into his gulf cart, "Yes, Ranger Rick is a very nice guy not like his twin brother Dick, who has had some problems with the law. And just because of Dick I always have to keep Old Spice Cologne at the store"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
After the golf cart pulled out of sight all four girls looked at each other and at the same time said "WHO LEFT THE DOOR UNLOCKED"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Old Spice

The girls scoured through ever crack, crevise, door, cupboard, closet and under ever bed, dresser, couch and table. No sign of a would-be rapist/attacker anywhere. Phew!!! They could all eat breakfast in peace and rest and relax or do whatever they wished without fear for the rest of the day. But where had that scent come from? Who had eaten Kim's cheerios? It was a mystery that would just have to stay a mystery.

Judy got out the puzzle and Shauna joined in. Doris had to race tonight and needed to get home to get stuff ready. As with all races, she hoped Ritzy would bring home the dough. If the happy campers chose to stay a couple more nights then she may return in the morning. She'd let them know. They all wished her luck and Doris was on her way out of the campgrounds by 9:30. It was a beautiful morning and the girls were already planning a big pre-lunch hike. The ground was a bit gooey from last nights rain but the trails shouldn't be too treacherous, they decided they were up to it. Afterall, with all that had happened already, they could handle just about anything. Before they walked back to the cabin after the hike they figured they'd better stop off at the old general store to replenish their stock. All agreed and after the half hour of pooping, dressing, chap-sticking and getting prepped for the trek, they headed for the trails.

The trails were breath-taking. The birds were singing, the tree's leaves were rustling."Such a glorious day the Lord hath made!"exaulted Kim, "Rejoice and be glad!" gleefully added Judy. Patsy was leading the way, laughing at pretty much everything that was said. Shauna carried a big walking stick to whack at briars and everyone took in the beauty. Judy had left behind her bag and didn't even miss it! This was a wonderful day with not a care in the world!!

They arrived at the general store and picked up some bread, cookies, chips and all the fixins' to make a pizza. The old man, as nice as ever, sat at the counter and asked how they were and chit chatted with common conversation. He asked if they had everything and commented that they didn't get milk. "Come to think of it, we do need milk," said Shauna "how did you know?" "Oh, just a guess!" the old man said teasingly as he winked. "Everyone needs milk don't they?" They all nodded their heads in agreement. Judy absentmindedly reached for her bag to pay for the supplies and "OH SHOOT!! I forgot my bag!! I don't have any money on me!!" The others looked at each other and noone had even so much as a dime. "We'll have to come back later and get our stuff. We're sorry," Judy apologised. "Now don't you ladies worry about a thing. I'll just bring your bags right to your door. It'd be easier than you having to carry them anyway. I'll give you a few minutes to get back then I'll be on my way with all your goodies."

The happy campers thanked the nice old man, said their goodbyes and went on their way back toward the cabin. "Hey guys" said Kim as she stopped in her tracks, "That smell! That old man smell! It just dawned on me! I smelled it back at the store and it just struck me!" "What are you talking about?" Patsy asked while chuckling. "Hey, you're right!" Shauna added. "He DID smell like an old man!!!" "Guys! Keep it down!!! He'll hear you!!" piped in Judy cautiously. "Of course he smells like an old man. He IS an old man!!" "No! That Old Spice smell we smelled in the cabin. It's HIM!! HE was in our cabin when we WEREN'T!!" Kim peered over her shoulder. She just knew the old man was right behind them and was going to put them all in a bag, take them back to his lair and eat them for his supper."He KNEW we needed milk because he's the one that ate the cheerios too, I'll bet", deduced Patsy. "My bag! My bag! Where's my bag?!" Judy was wringing her hands in worry. She probably had old man repellant in one of it's compartments. Shauna was now ahead of the pack and took charge. "Ladies, we need to hurry. We have to get back back to the cabin before he does. Let's go!" "That old man doesn't scare me" Patsy said confidently. "Yep, I can take him!" "Well, now's your chance Patsy" said Judy clutching onto Kim's shirt, "because there sits his golf cart in front of our cabin".............